Lasting Impressions

There have been a lot of changes the past 4 months.  2.5 year relationship ended, which I'm still struggling to find peace with. Long-distance relationships are hard. Harder than anything I've ever had to do before...well, driving 200 miles a day was pretty exhausting and taking 25 credits was a little over the top. However, long distance takes work and effort. It's easy to get into a routine and live your life without your person in it every day. On my way to work today I had this sense of hurt on my heart. The scars are resurfacing. The scars from 6 years ago. The scars from 10 years ago. The scars of incompatible relationships. The scars of not feeling like I'm worth the time to be put first. By no means do I believe that I'm above anyone else, or need the title of being a princess. Every person deserves to feel as though they are valued; whether it is valued as a co-worker, partner, friend, or coach. This applies to all ages....everyone deserves to feel worthy

These last few months have brought about quite a few changes....let me break it down for you. 1. I moved....long story...I'll get there 2. I have a new job....this correlates with me moving 3. New house 4. I decided I needed to do what was best for myself and K..this will be vague for obvious reasons. Number 1 - Moving I received a call at the end of July in regards for an elementary opening in Alexandria School District. I was more than ready to go back to Mora for start of year #2 as the health/pe and Empowerment of Women teacher. I was offered the position, and accepted it. With that being said, I had just sold my house 6 weeks ago, which meant I was literally homeless. The housing marking is sky-high and a sellers market. I really didn't want to take steps backwards and move back in with my mom and dad.  I searched for house rentals, apartments, the works. It just didn't make sense to spend that kind of money and not get any equity out of it. I've become a b

I've been at this blogging thing for a little over 10 years. This was before blogs were even super popular. And while I don't opening share my blog on my social media, the people who read it have been avid readers and I appreciate you! I think my need for privacy, even though I'm posting this online, is likely due to my careers: law enforcement and teaching. As I logged onto my Blogger account today I noticed I had a draft titled, "Year 1 done!" I opened up the post and it was completely blank. WOW....I was either distracted by something or just needed a break from all the school stuff. But I did make it through and have a job for next year. Year 1 is always a learning experience from what I hear from veteran teachers. I hope to maybe someday write a book about, "What college DOESN'T teach you about being a teacher." However, I was fortunate to connect with an amazing online group of teachers through a Teachers Helpline Facebook group. There were

I have had the opportunity to binge watch some old favorites on Hulu this past weekend due to illness on my part and then Miss K with strep for 2 days. It got me thinking about a lot of things. 1)My future 2) My past 3) Happiness 4) Life 1. My future: This has always been a struggle for me. I've always thought of the positive and negatives of large decisions, but I also take into account on what others will think. Now with being "tied" to another 1/2 I feel as though my decisions on making my life better are always determined by him. I do everything in my power to move on and be the best version of myself, but never feel like anything will ever be good enough. Not a good enough relationship, not a good enough career, and definitely not a good enough mom. I don't do enough for her, I'm not doing enough STEM activities at home with her. I don't cook enough home cooked meals during the week for her, and I don't make a cold lunch everyday. These inse